Veterans and Loneliness: Why Leaving the Military Feels Isolating and What Helps

Last updated: October 24, 2026

Military life comes with a ready-made community. You eat, train, travel and face hard things alongside the same people, often for years. Then you leave, and that structure disappears almost overnight. Many veterans say the hardest part of civilian life is not finding a job or a home. It is finding people who understand.

With Veterans Day in the US and Remembrance Day in the UK and Commonwealth on November 11, here is what new research says about loneliness among veterans, why it happens, and practical ways for veterans and their families to rebuild connection.

TL;DR: Veterans and loneliness is a growing concern. A 2026 national US study found 58.7% of veterans report at least moderate loneliness, and frequent loneliness has risen since 2019-2020. Leaving the forces, moving, bereavement and health problems are key triggers. Peer groups, volunteering and regular contact with old comrades help.

How common is loneliness among veterans?

Very common. In the latest national US study, almost six in ten veterans reported moderate or frequent loneliness.

Veteran loneliness is the feeling of disconnection many former service members experience after leaving the military, often linked to losing close-knit unit relationships, shared purpose and a structured way of life.

According to Pietrzak, Fischer and Na in The Journal of Clinical Psychiatry (Aug 2026), a nationally representative survey of 2,636 US veterans, carried out between December 2025 and January 2026 as part of the National Health and Resilience in Veterans Study, found that 58.7% reported at least moderate loneliness. That included 36.3% with moderate loneliness and 22.4% with frequent loneliness. Frequent loneliness had risen significantly from 19.7% in 2019-2020.

The authors also found a clear dose-response link between loneliness and mental health problems: the lonelier veterans were, the more likely they were to be struggling. That makes connection a real priority, not a nice-to-have.

Are veterans lonelier than the general population?

In the UK, slightly. Official data shows a higher share of veterans feel lonely at least some of the time than adults overall.

According to the UK Office for National Statistics' Veterans' Survey 2022 analysis (Dec 2024), 31.3% of UK veterans said they felt lonely always, often or some of the time. For comparison, the ONS estimated 27.0% of adults in the general population of Great Britain felt the same over a similar period. Among disabled veterans, 39.4% felt lonely at least some of the time, compared with 22.9% of veterans who were not disabled.

Source: ONS Veterans' Survey 2022, published December 2024. These are official statistics in development.

Why do veterans feel lonely after leaving the military?

Because leaving the forces often means losing a tight community, a clear role and a shared language all at once.

A 2018 report by the Royal British Legion on loneliness in the Armed Forces community found that half of survey respondents said leaving the Armed Forces had caused them to feel lonely or socially isolated, and half said moving to a new area had done the same. Bereavement was the single greatest cause of loneliness among respondents.

Common triggers include:

1. Losing the unit. Relationships built under pressure are hard to replace.
2. Losing purpose. Civilian jobs may not offer the same sense of mission.
3. Moving. Service often means many moves, leaving few deep local roots. Our guide to feeling lonely in a new city covers how to settle somewhere new.
4. Feeling misunderstood. Civilians may not grasp what you have experienced.
5. Health and injury. Disability makes getting out and staying in touch harder.
6. Bereavement. Losing comrades, partners or family hits especially hard.
7. Age and retirement. Many veterans are older, and later life brings its own changes. See our guide to being lonely after retirement.

Why is loneliness a particular issue for male veterans?

Most veterans are men, and men often have fewer close confidants and find it harder to ask for help.

Many men's friendships are built around shared activities rather than talking, and military culture can reinforce a "get on with it" attitude. When the shared activity ends, so can the friendship. Our deep dive on the male loneliness epidemic looks at what the data shows for men more broadly and what helps. The NHRVS researchers also noted that the veteran population is becoming younger, more female and more diverse, groups they identify as at elevated risk of loneliness.

How can veterans rebuild connection?

Seek out people who share your experience, find a new mission, and keep regular, low-pressure contact with old friends.

Ideas many veterans find helpful:

• Veteran organisations. The American Legion, VFW, Royal British Legion and similar groups run social clubs, events and peer networks.
• Peer support. Talking with other veterans who have been through transition can be easier than explaining yourself to civilians.
• A new mission. Volunteering, coaching, mentoring young people or disaster response can restore purpose. Our guide to volunteering and loneliness covers what research says about how much helps.
• Regimental and unit reunions. Online groups make it easier to find people you served with.
• Physical challenges. Running clubs, hiking groups and adaptive sports bring structure and camaraderie.
• Family time. Partners and children often feel the transition too, so build new routines together.

How can you support a veteran who seems lonely?

Reach out regularly, invite them to specific plans and listen without pushing.

Practical tips:

1. Ask directly. "How are you really doing?" can open a door.
2. Make it specific. Invite them to a match, a walk or a meal rather than offering vague support.
3. Do not demand stories. Let them share what they want, when they want.
4. Mark November 11 together. Attending a Veterans Day or Remembrance event can be a powerful shared moment.
5. Know the support lines. Be ready to share crisis contacts if someone is struggling.

Where can veterans get urgent support?

If you or a veteran you know is in crisis, contact a dedicated veterans' crisis line or emergency services straight away.

In the US, the Veterans Crisis Line is available by dialling 988 and pressing 1, or by texting 838255. In the UK, Op COURAGE offers NHS mental health support for veterans, and Samaritans are available on 116 123 in the UK and Ireland. Elsewhere, contact your local emergency number or veterans' services. Loneliness is linked to serious mental health risks in veterans, so do not wait if things feel unmanageable.

Can technology help veterans feel less alone?

Yes, for staying in touch with distant comrades and family, and for some, as a source of everyday conversation.

Video calls, messaging groups and online forums make it easier to stay connected with people you served with, wherever they live now. Some veterans also enjoy talking with an AI companion on quiet evenings, as a low-pressure way to unwind or put thoughts into words. That can be a nice extra, but it should never replace human connection or professional support.

FAQ

What percentage of veterans are lonely?

According to a 2026 study in The Journal of Clinical Psychiatry, 58.7% of US veterans report at least moderate loneliness, including 22.4% with frequent loneliness, up from 19.7% in 2019-2020. In the UK, ONS data from the Veterans' Survey 2022 found 31.3% of veterans felt lonely always, often or some of the time.

Why do veterans struggle with loneliness?

Leaving the military often means losing a close-knit unit, a clear purpose and a structured routine. Many veterans also move frequently, have health problems or injuries, or feel civilians do not understand their experiences. A Royal British Legion report found half of respondents said leaving the Armed Forces caused loneliness, and bereavement was the greatest cause.

How can veterans make friends after leaving the military?

Veterans often reconnect through veteran organisations, peer support groups, unit reunions, volunteering and team sports. Shared experience makes it easier to build trust, and regular activities give friendships time to grow. Keeping in touch with old comrades online and saying yes to invitations, even when it feels easier to stay home, also helps.

When is Veterans Day and Remembrance Day?

Both fall on November 11. In the US, Veterans Day honours everyone who has served in the armed forces. In the UK and many Commonwealth countries, Remembrance Day marks the end of the First World War and honours those who died in conflict, with Remembrance Sunday commemorations on the nearest Sunday.

Can an AI companion help a lonely veteran?

An AI companion can offer friendly conversation at any hour, which some veterans enjoy on quiet nights. It is not a person, a fellow veteran or a mental health service, so it works best as a small extra alongside family, friends and veteran communities. Anyone in crisis should contact a veterans' crisis line or emergency services.

A friendly voice when the house is quiet

Veterans rebuild connection one friendship and one routine at a time. On the evenings in between, a little extra company can help.

MyBabe is an 18+ AI boyfriend and girlfriend app for iPhone and Android. Your companion texts you first, remembers what you share, sends voice notes and photos, and picks up voice and video calls when you feel like talking. Start free with 10 messages every 24 hours and a two-minute call to try. Premium is $5.99 a week, $14.99 a month or $99.99 a year, with long-term memory and about 30 minutes of calls a week. Your companion is an AI, not a person or a support service. Meet your companion on MyBabe.